This Anniversary Goes to Eleven

Friday was our anniversary. Blogger did not get their act together in time for me to post something on the actual day. (I haven't been able to log in to this ol' blog since last Tuesday. Based on their Known Issues, I wasn't the only one having trouble with Blogger. There were times I felt quite a bit of frustration about this, since I have - prepare yourselves - four blog posts ready to go, but then I remembered, wait I don't actually pay anything for this service. And in about four years, I've never really had any problems. So at that point I decided to just go ahead and keep my mouth shut.) Unfortunately, I also did not get my act together in time to do, well, pretty much anything else on the actual day.

So, this is how it went:

"Happy anniversary, honey! I got you the present of spending zero of your hard-earned dollars on any of those fancy-schmancy gizmos all the guys have these days. Also, whatcha want to do today?"**

This is what we did:

Pretty much nothing. At least in the morning. At least nothing that I really remember. I think there might have been doughnuts. (You'd think I would remember doughnuts. I feel a little ashamed.) Then we got Eden ready and took her over to a friend's house to hang out and be responsibly cared for and napped while we high-tailed it to Edwardsville for a movie (scarfing down McDonald's on the way. Note to self: scarfing McDonalds is not a good idea. Please do not repeat.) We saw Thor. Why? Because we had some Groupon movie tickets that were about to expire and that was the only movie playing anywhere near us that fit into the appropriate child-free time range. And Pirates of the Caribbean IV was/is getting even more terrible reviews. And I like Natalie Portman.

However:

Natalie Portman let me down. Actually the movie is fine. You know what I mean, for a super-hero action flick. The special effects were very pretty but the dialogue was frequently horrendous, and I spent a good chunk of the film kind of hoping the bad guy might actually win and annihilate every once else. Perhaps especially Thor and Natalie Portman, I am sad to say.

After the movie we drove to the home where Eden was staying, picking up pizza along the way. We ate dinner with our friends and spent the rest of the evening researching places to stay for our July road trip to General Conference. All in all, it was a pretty quiet day. Not especially notable in any particular way, at least not in comparison to how we were able to celebrate our tenth anniversary. (Go here for Day Two.)

I had mixed feelings about that.

The truth is marriage is really hard sometimes. (I know, I know, alert the media.) It involves a lot of sharing: sharing of money, food (this is here because I really do not like people eating my french fries), closet space, personal space in general, responsibility, years of life, etc. Sharing is mostly awesome (or so we tell Eden), but sometimes, not so much. Sometimes, just sometimes, I want to do things my way. Sometimes, I want it to be all about me. And we see evidence of this whole marriage-is-hard thing around us all the time. So, because of that, I think wedding anniversaries should be celebrated, and frankly, celebrated BIG. Because it's a big deal.

On the other hand, there was something slightly soothing about the relatively-quiet-and-simple approach. Eleven years. It's like a groove now, this daily working out of our vows to each other. Most of the time, it works. And even when it doesn't work, even when we both feel capable of quite cheerfully strangling the other person, even then I know, this is right. So right for me. So right for us. So right for this little family that I love with all my heart.

Happy anniversary, Pete! Last year, we were just a ten - thanks for helping me put it up to eleven. I love you!


**This is a variation of one of Eden's current favorite phrases. I hear, "Mama! Whatcha gonna do today?" or "Mama! What we gonna do today?" all the time. And I know you think I'm exaggerating, but I am NOT. Not only do I get this question first thing in the morning, but also while we're getting dressed, eating breakfast, immediately after discussing what, in fact, we are going to do today, during every single car ride everywhere, at the library, grocery store, park, backyard, and not infrequently, as we are getting her ready for bed. It has replaced, "What's happening?" as the phrase most often heard in this house. In case you can't tell, it sometimes leaves me feeling a little frazzled.